Articles Written by Wendy Mackowski: Success Tips

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Wendy Mackowski
has earned the Certification as a Professional Co-Active Coach (CPCC) after completing two years of training from The Coaches Training Institute. Wendy has also written many articles on various life & business coaching topics.

Wake Up! Are You Missing Your Life?

by Wendy Mackowski, Inner North Coaching

In the screensaver mode on my computer I have arranged a selection of family photos: great scenery of oceans and forests I’ve visited, family and friends, weddings and vacations. They automatically pop up to fill the screen when it’s inactive. At first people enjoyed watching the "slide show" of my life as they sat in my office. Now, it’s become old hat. Neither them nor me notice much anymore.

So I ask you: Where in your life is your screensaver running? What are the programs you run when you want to check out for a while? Don’t we all spend more time there than we’d like to admit? We all have them--our ruts, routines, and canned responses: Have a nice day; how are you doing; take care; even sometimes--love you. The auto responses that help us sleep through our day.

"What’s wrong with that?" You say. "Everyone needs down time. If we tried to be conscious every moment, we’d be exhausted and never get much done." This is true. Human nature is very much like our computers in this instance--it tends to default into sleep mode very easily. The question is, how much of your time do you want to spend there? If you spend too much time there the price is disconnection from yourself and others, lack of passion and enthusiasm for life, loss of meaning and purpose. When we get excessively busy and stressed we tend to live in that mode more and more of the time. But the good new is...all you have to do to wake up again in your life is nudge the mouse! Just a slight movement in any direction and you will be back online, fully connected to your five senses and your own conscious actions.

Some people sit too long in sleep mode and never move the mouse until something comes along that sends it sailing right off the mouse pad--a serious health problem, a death in the family, a divorce. But most of us would prefer to get nudges in a more positive way. Here are a few suggestions for everyday ways that you can start remembering to be more awake, more connected and consciously aware of your own life during the day. Hopefully these suggestions and the ones you invent for yourself will bring more joy and aliveness into your daily routines.

Rut Busters: Just do things differently! Try a new way home from work. Eat at a new restaurant something you’ve never tried eating before. Move furniture around in your house or office; wear your watch on the wrong arm. What are some ways you can think of that will break your routine?

Awareness Moments: In the middle of your busy day take just one moment in time to stop and be aware of the moment you are in: your breathing, where your body is holding tension, wiggle your toes and be aware of the ground under your feet, what are you feeling inside--anxious, calm, content, hungry? Also be aware of your surroundings and all of your senses. This can be done for just 30 seconds or less—but it will always bring you back to the present moment.

Shifting to Gratitude Mode: In your head, maybe on the commute home, go into a grateful perspective. Look around you and see what your can appreciate that you might not have noticed before: the brilliant red of the fall leaves, the feel of the leather seats in your car, the great song on the radio, the base in those stereo speakers, it’s endless!

Meaningful Conversations: Have deep and meaningful conversations with other people. It can be friends, family, or groups. The more meaningful your conversations, the more alive you feel.

Silent Reflection Time: Whether you meditate, pray, journal, or take walks alone you need to take time each day to get quiet and centered and be the observer of yourself so you can reflect on your day and your life. Listen to the small still voice within.

Be in Nature: Take time to be outside in nature to connect with the earth in some way even if it’s just a 15-minute walk on break.

Begin to Notice: Start to pay attention and create your own ways for "nudging your mouse". Maybe every time you need to wake up your computer to begin working again, you can take the clue for yourself too. The more you remember to stay awake in your life, the richer your experience will be.

Allow for the Sleep Mode: Know that you will drift into the screensaver now and then. It’s really OK and probably necessary to spend time there also. It’s true that every moment of our life can’t be rich with experience. At least throw some of your OWN photos into the program. Don’t be satisfied with the MS Windows logo bouncing around in front of you. Consciously create what you want to have "pop up" when you are on autopilot. And change it around now and then for variety! It’s another way to nudge the mouse.

Wendy Mackowski, a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach, lives in Orange County, California and is the owner of Inner North Coaching. For more information about coaching, sign up for Wendy's free email newsletter, or permission to reprint this story, contact Wendy.

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