Articles Written by Wendy Mackowski: Success Tips

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Wendy Mackowski
has earned the Certification as a Professional Co-Active Coach (CPCC) after completing two years of training from The Coaches Training Institute. Wendy has also written many articles on various life & business coaching topics.

Life: Are We Having Fun Yet?

by Wendy Mackowski, Inner North Coaching

I wake up with a start: "Oh no, it's already 7 am!" Today is my one free day with no clients scheduled. A day where I would have time to meditate, journal, do yoga, and walk before writing my newsletter and finishing an audio product I'm creating. I begin to feel uptight immediately because of the late start. I feel the need to rush now to fit all the things in that are meant to balance my life. I think about the newsletter and my mind feels void of any creative ideas. What will I possibly write about? I feel the self-imposed pressure that this day might get wasted. The clock becomes my enemy as it ticks away while I hurry to make coffee and grab a piece of toast.

TIME OUT!

Are we having fun yet? Does this scene seem familiar to anyone else out there? Things that are supposed to be fun and self-nurturing I've managed to transform into more chores on my already too long list. And isn't this the lifestyle I've worked so hard to create? This wonderful unstructured day that was supposed to be filled with creativity and flow has suddenly succumbed to the tight controls of productivity schedules.

Have you ever noticed how we manage to suck the fun right out of things; Things that we started out doing because we loved them? We are attracted to a certain career, business, person, or lifestyle because it seems so right. It feels good and looks like a lot of fun. And then what do we do? We get serious. And then we screw it up. Not that we shouldn't be serious - but does serious have to mean hard, complicated, obligated, boring, full of should and have to and must?

What if it doesn't? What if we can commit to things and still hold onto the passion, the kid-like excitement and enthusiasm, the curiosity, the lightness and the fun that attracted us to it in the first place? What if we don't have to control it?

Take the business. Can we allow it to unfold? Instead of the pressure to succeed, how about the passion to do our best, the curiosity to learn all we can, and the focus on using our talents and skills in the ways that drew us into the business to begin with? Allow the fun and creativity to emerge.

How about the relationships? What if you could let go of the old baggage, forgive the past, and begin each day with curiosity instead of expectations? What if you focused on what you love about that person and began to nurture that piece alone?

So I'm saying lighten up! The best place to begin is with you. Try taking yourself less seriously. Realize that none of the important details in your life right now will be important 100 years from now. Okay, even ten years from now. Will they even be important a year from now? They are a lot like all those birthday presents we get every year. Who remembers what they got? What is remembered is the love behind them. It's the love that remains.

That all sounds wonderful you say, but I have to live in the real world where the phone still rings with urgency, the emails still pile up, and the bills don't seem to care abut my need to go with the flow.

It's true that our circumstances may not change, at least at first. But only you can change how you approach those circumstances. Only you can make the choice whether to carry lightness into the situation, or get sucked into a black hole. Only you can choose to make time in your life for more things that bring you joy.

I guarantee that if you do make those choices, you will not only be better equipped to handle things better in the real world, you will slowly begin to notice how your circumstances will begin to change.

Here are a few questions to just play with:

Where have I become too serious in my life?
What will help me lighten up?
What am I afraid to let go of?
What do I notice when I make the choice to approach things with more ease and child-like curiosity?
How can I bring more joy into my life?

Wendy Mackowski, a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach, lives in Orange County, California and is the owner of Inner North Coaching. For more information about coaching, sign up for Wendy's free email newsletter, or permission to reprint this story, contact Wendy.

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